With it being Fast Sunday, I have felt like I should write down and share some bits and pieces of my own Testimony--as well as some other experiences that have happened this last week.
On Friday morning, I had to opportunity to go to the Temple with my Mom, and Grandma & Grandpa Cowan. That morning, it seemed like nothing went right! (My alarm didn't go off, so I was running late, I cut myself shaving in the shower, I couldn't find my shoes, and then my keys went missing!) I was so excited to be able to go to the temple, but my thoughts and feelings quickly turned into down and discouraging ones with all of this happening. It was a rough morning! I definitely know that someone DID NOT want me to go to the temple, and that he would do anything he could to distract me and not let me get there. Even though we were a few minutes late, we did get to the Temple, and I am beyond grateful and happy that we did! The Temple is definitely the House of the Lord, and I truly feel like I am in his presence there. All of my earthly cares and worries wash away when I am there, and I am able to focus on the things that matter most to me--my savior, my family, my husband & sweet baby girl. While sitting in the Celestial Room, I was overcome with the spirit, and tears filled my eyes as I felt Brenna's special spirit. I know she was there. As I felt her spirit near me, she started moving inside me like I have never felt before! It was as if she was trying to say that she was there, and she wasn't going anywhere. She reassured me that everything would be ok. I am so grateful for the experiences and the peace felt in the temple. Many questions were answered, and much needed peace and comfort was felt as I was there. The temple is so important to me, and I am so glad that because of the covenants Tyler and I made in the temple, we get to be with our children, and each other, FOREVER.
I am beyond grateful for so many good examples in my life. I am surrounded by so many wonderful people who know who they are and what they stand for--even in a world full of filth and distractions, they stay strong, and find the good in everything. I have to admit, that I am terrified for my own kids. The world is getting to be such a negative influence--everything I believe as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, is completely opposite of what the world now views as "correct" or "acceptable". Nothing is sacred anymore--there is so much hate and opposition that we all face on a daily basis. I hope and pray that I will be an influence for good, and that I might be able to help my own kids see and be the good in the world. I hope I will be able to teach them, and that they will always feel like they have somewhere to turn in times of trouble. I know I will never be able to shelter them from all of the evil in the world. Sadly there is no way to avoid it, but I will do everything I can to teach them, to help them develop their own testimonies, and have a desire to choose the right.
I am so thankful for the Priesthood. It has always been such a huge blessing to me, and has helped me in times of trouble. I am so blessed to have such righteous men in my life, who are worthy to hold the Priesthood, and use it to better the lives of those around them. My dad has always been an example to me, and I look up to him--he has always been there to give me a blessing whenever I need it. I am so thankful for Tyler, and for the blessings, advice, and council that he has given me. I am so glad my children will be able to grow up with the Priesthood in our home. I am also so grateful, that when Brenna does get here, that she will be able to have Priesthood blessings, that will hopefully help her through the trials she will face so early in life.
Prayer is one of the many things that I have really come to rely on throughout my life, especially when facing hardships. It is the only way I can communicate with my Heavenly Father, if I need something, or am looking for an answer to a question I might have, or even just to thank him for all he has given me. It has been such a help to me, to know that no matter where I am, or what I am doing, that I can pray and he will be listening. I know that prayer will bring me closer to my Heavenly Father, and that no matter what I am feeling, or going through, I can turn to him. Every time I pray, I know that he is there, and that our relationship is being strengthened and he is sending blessings my way.
Fasting goes hand in hand with prayer. I have had many experiences with fasting, and witnessed many miracles because of it--both in my own life, and in the lives of those who were struggling. I am so thankful to all of you, who have fasted in Brenna's behalf. We have seen miracles already, and I know that we are going to see more! It is so great to know, that all of you are concerned for her, and want to help. My mom told me last fast Sunday, that my sweet 8 year old cousin, fasted a FULL 24 hours just for Brenna. Fasting isn't easy, especially when you are so young (let's be honest, it is never easy no matter how old you are!). I am amazed everyday at the willingness of friends and family to fast and pray for us. There are no words express our gratitude.
My heart is so full today, thinking of the many blessings we have, and are still receiving. We are so lucky to have such good family, who have taught us, and loved us, and helped us in hard times. I am so grateful that Brenna will be surrounded by such good people, who already love her, and care for her. My testimony truly has been strengthened, and I hope it will continue to grow, as we continue on this journey. We love you all! Thanks for all you do.
"Believe in Miracles"